i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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