Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry Aye_STFUimTlkin hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(703): View more from Virginia

someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...

Fav 7 952 1750
share tweet
(908): View more from New Jersey

the vacuum is drunk

(703): View more from Virginia

what?

(908): View more from New Jersey

i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk

Fav 17 3099 1075
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(216): View more from Ohio

Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?

(440): View more from Ohio

Probably.

(216): View more from Ohio

I'm in.

Fav 14 4523 832
share tweet
(520): View more from Arizona

JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!

(1-520): View more from Arizona

what?

(520): View more from Arizona

YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!

Fav 38 1082 4411
share tweet
(201): View more from New Jersey

it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships

Fav 28 1076 4477
share tweet
(803): View more from South Carolina

definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.

Fav 23 1030 4661
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(716): View more from New York

u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.

Fav 51 1094 5188
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(518): View more from New York

He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.

Fav 3 664 431
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(940): View more from Texas

Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.

Fav 1 276 177
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT