Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
