They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I have aggressive nipples.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
