dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize