8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Randomize