Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
