East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
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