with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
