Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I wish I only lived at night.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize
