didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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