What a fucking waste of an outfit
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Randomize
