Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Pants are for mortals
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Randomize
