If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize