Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize