there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize
