Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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