I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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