i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
