he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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