so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
im six kinds of drunk right now
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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