It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
