Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
