at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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