Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
