I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Randomize
