the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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