Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
