Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize
