The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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