his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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