problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
