Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
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