Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
It's never too late to be topless.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Randomize
