I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
this will be a night to untag.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize
