my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize