Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Randomize
