Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
