So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
