but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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