I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
