that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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