Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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