I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
