I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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