You're my little dorito
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Randomize
