I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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