It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
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