Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize
