She tied me up with her honor cords...
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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